Ridiculous Riding at Rackham

The day dawned clear and sunny for Rackham Horse Trials. By 8am, the event was already busy; grooms scurrying to and from various tents and arenas, horses leaving dewy hoof prints in the grass as they weave back and forth, performing various dressage movements, riders inspecting the fences they would be expected to tackle later on...

The scene was not quite as serene back home. In fact, I was blue in the face and about to call quits on the whole day because a perfectly stud sizes stone was lodged in Squirrel's shoe and my dad had to cancel his attendance because the cat needed antibiotics. That's fine I said, I've passed my HVG, I can take myself.

The whole yard was aghast. Maybe due to the fact my car is more dent-shaped than car-shaped. What about when you fall off and hurt yourself? Who will take care of the horse?  When?! I said haughtily, pointedly trying to hide my limp from my latest unscheduled dismount.

As it was, I set off on time. The fact I didn't do half the items on my to-do list (exercise young horse in prep for sponsored ride the next day being one of them..) is irrelevant, I left on time. Using my better judgement,  I decided to ignore the directions given to me by various more life-experienced people and set off, my phone shouting directions whilst tied in place to keep it charging.

Unfortunately, what I didn't predict, my phone did not realise I was in a lorry. A fairly large lorry. A lorry certainly not capable of going down roads narrower than 6 foot 6 inches. After taking out half a tree (Squirrel enjoyed the foliage that rained upon him) and bending my mirror completely out of place (more luck than judgement that I didn't take out any pedestrians for the rest of the route), I stopped in a pub carpark to gather my thoughts. Ignoring the urge to run into the pub with Squirrel in tow (trust me that horse can drink me under the table....but that's a story for another day), I figured out my route.

Eventually. Three agonising hours after setting off, I pulled into the Horse Trials. Ahhh I sighed happily, wiping sweat off my brow. Made it. I was greeted by a friend who incredibly generously came directly from her flight back from Portugal to keep me company (I owe her beer for life), gleefully telling me that all the horses were lame and the riders were all worse than her.

Apparantly, what I did not expect, was for her idea of "groom" to involve making helpful comments like "Fucking hell, you're jumping that?! You're going to die. What if he puts his feet down in the middle of that big spread, won't he fall over?  This is awful. LOOK AT THAT DITCH. You're going to die" and feeding Squirrel breakfast biscuits for energy ("They've got oats in them!") between phases.

For a change, I had a plan. I realised at Mattingly that if I trot aimless circles in the dressage warmup, my horse will amble aimlessly around the dressage arena. So I followed my usual at home warm up. Unfortunately, Squirrel has not mastered the art of long and low at a competition so instead I felt like I was riding a llama, but you can't win them all. I earned some suspicious looks from spectators when attempting to do my canter travers, but he felt pretty on point.

The test was okay. Obedient. The only real errors were the trot to walk and trot to halt transitions, where he took me slightly literally and pretty much collapsed. Unfortunately, this test contained 4 of them. But I didn't go wrong and we stayed in the arena during the give and take so I call it a success.

"Next time I'm using proper spurs, not ones with rubber wheels on," I complained bitterly as I left the arena."He's so lazy!" Unfortunately when I retrieved my test sheet, it appeared my 34.5 (sniff, we used to get 28s, I remember, in our days of glory) was more due to me having the accuracy of a 5 year old with a colouring book. Horse 1 Me 0

The less said about the show jumping, the better. I jumped fence one okay, then pretty much put Squirrel in a choke hold for the rest of the course, adding a stride to the related distance, adding a stride in the double, deciding he wasn't going to number number 9 so I almost fell off when he did....Miraculously all the poles stayed up. I left the ring with my face hidden, apologising profusely to my horse and suggesting he runs off and loads into a pro's lorry if he wants decent riding. Horse 2 Me 0.

Ah cross country. What its all about. As the ten second count down began,  I wizzed Pea-brain up, as usually, to try and coach some enthusiasm into him, and he bounded out the start box. Fence one came in his stride, as did fence two, although we were drifting suspiciously left on each approach. Now, now, that won't do, I said, there's skinnies later on. My attempt at keeping him straight involved burying him into the bottom of the lovely hedge that wanted steeplechasing. We had a lovely, joyful canter through some woods before being met by a log and some mushrooms on the way out.

Oh, jump? Said Squirrel. Uh yes JUMP I said, riding like a maniac. Then felt like a pro because I remembered to keep my elbows close to my sides to channel him for the skinny two strides out. Pop, pop.

Next was a big gappy spread. (The "What if he puts his legs down in the middle of it" fence.) At the time, I replied Oh its a nice gallop fence.  Did I gallop it? Did I hell. I held, and I held and I show jumped it and it was awful. Next was the sunken road. On the approach I remembered how I braked too hard for it at Mattingley and he stopped at the top before popping down without stepping back.

This time when he stopped a couple of strides out, I thought oh its ok, he hasn't gone back. He went sideways. Oh that's okay, he hasn't gone back. Then he went back. "First refusal" Oh damn  I said, I suppose I ought to try riding.

So I did and we slithered down it on the far left, meaning a sharp right hand turn (read; Haul at the mouth), to jump out and over the log at the top. Now another nice woody bit. Oh a roll top. Lets hold into it. Hold hold hold. Awkward jump. Oh it must of been those people over there  I thought, always blame the horse.

Next came the coffin. Roll top going in (hold hold hold hold), big jump over the ditch, oh crap I can't get the curving line to the angled hedge, better kick. So I did and he answered and pinged it. Up a little mound to a log (hold hold hold), scrambled over it, nice and steady down the mound, closed my legs for the skinny and yay got it.

Then came the water. I carefully lined up for the house preceding it, riding the exact line I planned. Hold hold hold. Oh fuck he stopped. Oh yeah. He does actually need riding. Keep telling him to stop and even the most generous horse in the world will get fed up. So  I gave myself a mental slap and popped over it, through the water and over the house the other side.

I managed to stop holding (Quite so much) and he got a little close to the trakhner, then a lovely jump over a hedge, held a little into the next roll top but not too bad, then it was my nemesis of the course.

I'm entered for Upton House Novice. Last time I went round there,  I had a run out at the right handed corner. We've jumped every other corner we've ever attempted perfectly, but being entered for that, I've decided we can't jump corners. To make it worse, first we had to go down two steps then it was on a curving, downhill line from there. Because it was a tricky fence,  I figured I should ride properly, so he popped down the steps sweet as you like, I closed my right elbow, channelled him through my legs and he jumped it beautifully.

Last two fences were easy, and it was over too soon.

So basically; in short; 1. I need to learn to ride 2. My horse deserves a better rider 3. I'm going to learn to ride and go break my neck trying to do a novice.


On a serious note; I felt very blessed tonight when I put my pony in his field. We had a cuddle and I breathed in his soft Squirrelly smell, and I acknowledged how very lucky I am to have such a fabulous horse. He's kind, he's generous, he's funny as hell and he's my very best friend.

Hypnotherapy , foam rollers and Equgility

So on Wednesday I had my first hypnosis session.

We mainly chatted about my life - didn't realise we would have to go into the gory depths of my childhood which was quite uncomfortable! But it was to give her a better idea of what kind of screed to use. I'm actually doing a distance learning course in Hypnosis and psychotherapy so it was very interesting to see it properly in practise.

She performed a short hypnosis on me, a more general confidence building and relaxation one, and I do have to admit I've been pretty mellow since! Next week  I will have a more riding orientated one. I have to admit, despite studying it and knowing how relaxing it is, I'm still not 100% convinced that it can actually change thoughts and behaviours so well, but apparently it does so what have we got to lose?

My foam roller also arrived (a piece of the equipment for the fitness plan I have) and jesus I'm in love with it. If you turned up unannounced at my house you'd probably get a bit of a shock finding me contorted in some strange position with an expression of pure pain on my face but oh my god. I've had a back ache for the last few days and literally did less than 5 minutes work and its gone! Bit stiff this morning but I'll do some stretches and some more rolling before I start on my day.

I was busy backing a lovely young dressage horse on Wednesday, got back to my car to find 5 missed calls from my sponsor - Ruth Mawer from Equigility  who treats my horse's muscles. I'd forgotten they had a treatment! Both were in fantastic shape which is great news as Lexi was getting quite sore through her back, but Ruth felt she's getting much stronger.

Tomorrow we're off to Rackham horse trials to compete in the BE100; we're HC as Sunday when the open section is, I'm off with a friend to the New Forest for a sponsored ride to show the feral one some sights and sounds.

Back in business!

Hopefully going to get this blog going a bit more consistently now.

Quick low down of the last few months;

• Went to Munstead, had a disaster with several stops
• Went to Elmwood, great dressage, great SJ, two stops xc. Lexi also went and did a brilliant first event apart from an upset at the water
• Had his hocks treated with steroids and tildren; hello new horse!
• Went to Mattingly unaffiliated and jumped a great double clear to finish 7th

So, I've had a chat with my trainer and we have plans...big ones...Called Aldon 1*

I've decided to throw the book at it.

In the long term, I'm going to struggle to keep Squirrel BE eventing sound. The tildren is £900 a pop and by the end of the season he'll of had 3 treatments. Next year  Lexi will be doing more, and just the time and expense of two horses competing affiliated is difficult.

So this is the last year I'll be competing Squirrel BE. If he makes it to Aldon, he'll never outdo that. If he doesn't, then he never will. There's no point really in me competing him in BE100s as he has to do the opens so can't do qualifiers ect, I may as well save a bit of money and stress and play with him unaffiliated at a lower level where his hocks can cope without as much help.

So I'm giving it everything I've got.
I've changed his diet, put him on every supplement known to man kind, weekly lessons, extra physio and chiro. Magnet hock boots, daily massages from my equissage pad...

The buck doesn't stop with him though.
I'm having a few hypnosis sessions (first one today!) to help with my mental block regarding novice and sports psychotherapy. I'm focusing on my own health; clean eating, running so I don't end up dying after fence 4 cross country, lunge lessons, a special equestrian athlete training plan to make me stronger and more balanced, enough sleep, sports massage, chiro....everything

My theory being; if we don't make it, at least I tried as hard as I possibly can. And if I get the opportunity to ride this horse in top hat and tails, that will be a dream come true.


I think it will be very interesting to see the results of this so I'm going to blog carefully and consistently to observe what works and what doesn't make much difference.

My biggest obstacles are hours in the day but hey ho.


In other news, I now part own a once feral black welsh cob who is being produced for sale. We've had a few hiccups along the way, but he's now ticking along nicely.  I've also passed my HGV so the sky is the limit! Now I ought to stop chatting and get on with things..

He's still got it - Aston Le Walls 1

We had very civilised times for our first outing of the season - last to go with a 3.30pm dressage meant that despite the 1.5 hour trip, I didn't even start bathing until 9.30am!

We arrived in good time and I set off to walk the course. There were a few questions - I was surprised to see a double of corners at 5 (and promptly saw someone get eliminated there), we also had a step up, step down to a skinny and a couple of angled combinations. I was very excited!

Squirrel warmed up nicely for the dressage although it was only after I dropped my whip that he started swinging from behind like he has been at home. Unfortunately we lost the connection a little in the test and were marked down for having a slightly unsteady contact, and we also struck off on the wrong leg for one canter. We scored 34.5 which left us midway in the section. I need to do some work on our dressage as we used to be very strong in this phase and seem to have slipped in the last year. Mind you, we are in open sections now so perhaps that makes the difference?

I was pleased to see the show jumping demanded riding with several dog legs and related distances opposed to the usual figure of 8! This kind of course suits Squirrel better as he's less inclined to get too onward bound. He was pinging in the warm up so I headed over a little early. We got a nice canter and popped fence one. We had fence 2 down which, for once, I'm going to say was his pole as  I placed him well and he had a good canter. Very rare for him to touch a fence without me messing up so I shan't complain! Popped fence 3, were onward bound into fence 4 which he tapped but it stayed. Came round the corner to the oxer at 5 and we were a long way off so I gave him a kick, he responded by lengthening then ballooning over it. Pro photographer got an extremely funny photo which in hindsight, I wish I bought...we ahem galloped at fence 6, I managed to get him back for the double and the last two fences so finished on 4 faults.

Then FINALLY, after what feels like a lifetime of waiting, it was cross country time! I was a little concerned how the sun would effect him, as it was very low and in some directions it was right in your line of sight and rather blinding.

He stormed out the start box and ate up the first 4 fences in quick succession. I shortened him before the double of corners, kept my outside rein and elbow close to my side and my shoulders back, I felt him lock on and he knew what to do. Next couple of fences were a simple chair and a brush fence, then it was the step combo. I shortened him and got him bouncy, he bounded up, I took a half halt, popped down the drop, channelled him for the skinny but he read it and popped through straight as a die. Next was a hay wagon type table which was fine, then the water.

Decent size brush, couple of strides to splash in then up a ramp over a log and down again. He can be a little looky at water but not today, stayed in canter through the water, then quickly settled back into his rhythm. We jumped the next few fences out of a gallop, then came round a corner to two angled pheasant feeders on two strides. Despite being blinded by the sun, he listened and popped through happy as larry. Then another table, and the next combination was a table, two strides to a brush on an angle. Again we couldn't see a thing but he popped through anyway. Galloped to the last and finished! What a ride!  I barely put my leg on, he understood every question and delivered.

We had..ahem....13 too fast penalties. We weren't the only ones; several went too fast, but to be honest, I don't care. We weren't in the running for a placing anyway, and the fact he felt so keen and happy to do his job means the world to me.

On the way home we had a disaster where the alternator on the lorry broke and we suddenly had no lights! We managed to pull into a layby and awaited rescue. After much debating with the recovery man, we managed to nurse the lorry to a nearby services to avoid having to shut the A34 whilst Squirrel was loaded onto the horse transport. My dad stayed with the lorry which went straight to the garage, and I finally picked him up at almost midnight! What a day!

Hopefully that will be fixed in time for Munstead at the end of March, and then I'm putting him into the Novice at Bovington! If he isn't happy this time trying to step up, he will stay at BE100. He's too special to push, but for now, whilst he feels better than ever, we will give it a go!

And it's happening!

The event season has started!

Off to Aston Le Walls today for the BE100 open on Squirrel. He is going better than ever, doesn't think he's a day over 8 and feels incredible.

I WILL post a big update from the last 18 months or so as soon as I find the time - I could seriously do with 32 hours in the day!

A tribute to my greatest supporter

When I was 5 and I completed a course of swimming lessons, my parents made a fatal mistake of asking what hobby I would like to pursue next.

Horses. My dad wasn't keen. Too expensive, too dangerous, the riding school was too far away. But my mum agreed. She found a riding school which was cheaper; it wasn't accredited and after learning how to rise to the trot in a field, you were let loose out hacking, progressively put on ponies trickier and trickier.

I ended up spending seven happy years there. Saturdays became Riding School day where my sister and I were turfed out the car at 8am and picked up again at 5.30pm. We poo picked and mucked out and hayed and fed and rode ponies bareback down to the fields.

Then my sister bought a horse, and my mum decided to get me a pony; Willow, on loan. My mum was terrified of horses. She could just about (and not without shaking) hold the end of a leadrope whilst my gentle pony nibbled on some grass. The moment I set foot in the show ring I caught the bug, and instantly our lives transformed.

We started competing every weekend. If I hadn't arranged something, my mum would ask where we were going. I simply left entry forms on the kitchen table with a postcode, and each Sunday my mum would pack the car and off we went.

I had horrendous nerves. I used to stress, snap and bitch most of the time before entering the ring and if it went wrong; woe betide anyone who crossed my path. I grew up (in time!) with more patience and my mum learnt that if I bit her head off within 15 minutes of warming up not to take it personally.

When Willow went lame, she happily bought me another pony. When that pony had problems, she threw time and money into it, determined to find out what was wrong. When I planned to go to university, she was more devastated at the loss of competitions than at me moving five hours away.

When  I decided to get a horse on loan that summer to compete before I moved, she was thrilled to once again take on the role of driver, supporter, biscuit feeder, cameraman and financer. When  I decided to not go to university and pursue horses instead, she couldn't of been happier for me.

When  I moved to work on a professional yard, she thought nothing of driving the lorry an hour to that yard the night before an event, treat us to a takeaway, camp in the lorry then get up at the crack of dawn to take me to an event.

An event 200 miles away?  No problem. A £500 entry for a three day I had no hope of winning? No problem. Camping in the lorry in sub zero temperatures the first weekend of March?  No problem. Twelve hours in the pouring rain and howling wind for a 3 minute cross country round? No problem. The horse needed physio/chiro/new saddle/vet treatment/more equipment (delete as applicable). No problem.

Nothing was too much effort or too expensive when it came to horses and my dreams. She spent hours preparing for events, helping me jump the horses, and gradually even plucked up the courage for the odd ride.

When I fell off, she kept her distance until I wasn't angry at myself anymore, then smiled and said nevermind and feed me cookies. When I won, she would embarrass me by cheering. If I wanted to buy a professional photo, she would get carried away and buy three.

It was a way of life for her, and one she wouldn't swap for the world.

In the middle of August 2014, she was diagnosed with aggressive lung cancer. On the 21st October, my amazing mum passed away.

It's been a tough time. I had to have my two retired ponies put to sleep as financially and timewise I couldn't cope. We've picked up the pieces, and both horses are on great form, and Squirrel is entered for Aston-le-Walls on the 7th March.

I will update on our comings and goings soon, but this is a well deserved tribute to the most amazing groom, chauffer, financer, photographer and supporter any young rider could wish to have.


Thank you mum, thanks for everything.